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D.A.R.L.I.N.G.S!

amylia
baba
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S.A.Y..C.H.E.E.Z!

Korea trip 2004!
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saints jalan raya 04' day 2
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W.A.T.S..D.O.N.E

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S.P.E.A.K..U.P

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Friday, July 09, 2004

* up and on! saints! *

had college day today.. boring as usual.. actually kinda had mixed feelings.. seeing those people receiving their prizes.. i kinda felt sad? not exactly sad la.. jus felt smthg..

suddenly realised how diff i am now,how diff things are going fer me.. so diff.. compared to my past..im no longer the one who does well in all her tests and exams, the one who gets to go up on stage, the one who people kinda look up to, a role model to the young ones... u see..? if u think u'r smart.. remember that there's always someone who's much smarter than u.. i feel that ever since i came to jc.. my studies kinda went from high up to downhill.. issit reallie me? not workin hard enuff.. or its jus me who's not smart enuff to compete with these people who takes like 10 subjects in sec sch and ace them all.. i have always think that im not that kind where u can jus read thru ur notes and ace ur exams, the smart kind,born wif it kind..

i worked real real hard to get to where i am today!! i sacrificed so much.. so so much.. am i jus gonna let everythin go to waste? am i forgettin how i cried so much, felt so disappointed when i did badly fer psle, am i forgettin how i suffered durin those 5 yrs of sec days jus to prove that i can do it! that pple fr NA can do it and in the end i succeeded..i guess i reallie am beginnin to forget.. forget how i've said b4 tt i do not want history to repeat... i do not want to see myself cryin, blamin myself, shuttin myself in the rm and wallow in despair like wat i did fer psle.. i want to see the same expression, feel the same emotions durin the 'A's result.. jus like the time when i received my 'N' and 'O's results.. the outburst of emotions, the tears of joy, the "im proud of you" tone from ur parents on the other end of the phone... i think,i hope i've woken up.. realised jus how important it is to give my all at this point of time... i've woken up...

(anyways,on a more happy note.. there's this man who led the singing of the sch song durin college day..he's crazy i tell u!! haha.. but then i can totally feel his semangat-ness, his passion and love for the st andrews family...he's so happy! wow, think if we have this kinda attitude in life,to have e passion in everythin we do i guess we'll be much more happier?! haha..)

::BLOggED:: @ 7/09/2004 10:15:00 PM